It’s over. BlogHer is over. If you even dipped your toe in the blog pool this weekend, there was no way you could escape it, what with 2,400 estrogen-fueled writers descending on New York City for three days, many of them chronicling every moment of their trip via Twitter. And Facebook. And their blog(s).  And comments on others’ blogs. It was enough to make the gals who stayed home feel a little like misfits. Because BlogHer is made out to be something of a prom, a place where magical things happen and gift bags are bestowed upon the masses. Both are true, of course, but no one ever mentions anything remotely negative. The fact that the vegan hotel options totally blew or that Blogger X was kind of a bitch in person or that thighs all over the great land were sticking to seats courtesy of the great humidity of 2010. So don’t feel too bad if you didn’t make it, because I bet at least two of those things actually happened. There were also quite a few of your peers who didn’t go this year and they will continue to be incredibly popular on the personal blogs they may neglect from time to time. (*cough*) You didn’t go this year, but you will survive.

There are many reasons, however, that you should try to go next round if you couldn’t make this one. The fact of the matter is that for the most part, the conference really is all it’s cracked up to be. It’s become a little like college in my mind: it will be what you make of it. Want to hang with fellow cooks and spend your nights dining out with like-palletted foodies? Can do. Want to see and be on the scene, attending every party known to bloggerkind and sleeping well through the next day’s morning sessions? You will not be alone. Want to build your brand during the day and focus on city sightseeing at night with your family in tow? Your people will be there, too. It’s a big blog world out there.

And those pictures of bloggers gleaming while standing in packs, breast to breast, squeezing: they’re real too. See, like college, these are adults, but unlike college, you know so many of these people even before meeting. You’ve known them through breakups and deaths and marriages and the birth of their babies. You know they hate robots and just what pictures to send them that will keep them up at night. You know one that recently moved in with a beau and another battling her weight loss demons. And all that stands between someone becoming one of your IRL closest is an introduction.

I don’t minimize how difficult it feels to take those first steps. I’m an introvert, a woman much more comfortable alone in my hotel haven than in a room overflowing with hundreds, even some I’ve written with for five years. I’m likely to make a mad dash through the lobby under hat and mustache, signing in under an assumed name. I like my anonymity. After all, that is a reason many of us write here. It’s a place where we can feel welcome and accepted without being known. I just encourage you not to let those fears hold you back. We’re all a part of a tribe, you see, and the vast majority of us feel the same nerves and pangs in the first moments and hours that we’re there. Can we do this? Will they really like me? Chances are if they like you on paper, they’ll like you in person. Jump into the pool and see. What’s there to lose, really?

I did get a giggle over just how neurotic we’ve all become in the weeks leading up to the event – I saw at least five posts pimped in my Twitter stream promising inside information as to what bloggers should pack for the conference. I find this to be pretty funny, folks, because a) I’m quite sure most of these very accomplished women have left their homes before and 2) it’s a conference where you are sure to be surrounded by 90 percent women (most men on site? They came with a woman). That last part is incredibly ironic, and I tweeted to that effect: I would guess that more attendees bought new dresses for a BlogHer 2010 party than for their last big date with their spouse or significant other. According to your tweets, more toenails were painted and eyebrows waxed last week than in all of the last year. Just the facts, people. In the end, it’s all kind of unnecessary. I bet they liked you regardless of that dress. You weren’t wearing it for your first 300 hundred posts, after all.

I’m pleased to see that with the exception of (quite) a few travel travails hit on the way home, most of you had lovely things to print about your experience and your fellow attendees, this year more than ever. For most, their time in NYC seemed to be a fulfilling experience, no matter the path they chose. Women seemed to love meeting the women they’d followed and read for years. The content of the sessions seemed stronger, as well; all the quotes I read from participants let me know that the messages being conveyed were strong and important ones. While things have ended for this year, the recovery, the aftermath, the I’m-home-and-missing-new-friends tweets are reminders of the impact that this community’s members really had on one another. And they make it sting just a little more to not have been there for 2010.

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Tickets to BlogHer 2011, to be held in San Diego, CA next August, are on sale now.