So . . . how have you been?
*twiddles thumbs*
*shifts uncomfortably in absolutely adorable pencil skirt*
Anything new with you?
*Bites thumb nail*
*Avoids eye contact, and not because you’re particularly unattractive*
Haven’t seen you in a while. Missed me?
*Feels absolutely ridiculous*
*Tosses aside excuses including DWTS audition, hair washing, peanut butter poisoning*
I’ve been missing. Truth is, there are several reasons why I can’t bring myself to write here lately, not limited to a complete inability to express myself comfortably online. As well as my newfound addiction to reading, which has reminded me that there are far superior minds at work not far from my apartment door. Not to mention signing up for Blockbuster online, which has me making out with either Dexter or Kate Winslet before making sweet love to Wordpress. As with all good relationships, it happens.
But what also happens in this blogosworld, dear friends, is that you become immersed. You succumb, it’s better stated, to the allure of the anonymous. It’s only semi-accountable, our relationship, less than you are to the DMV or your major professor. You don’t request I meet you for drinks or demand I have an honest reaction to the fourth retelling of your boyfriend/boss/hot mess tranny drama. Thankfully, only a few of you request I use polysyllabic words in conversation. What we have is comfortable, but perhaps too much so, like those full-body fleece pajamas that are all the rage on SkyMall. They’re appealing, of course, with their feety goodness and their desirable ass flaps, but they make you into a something of a mainstream freak.
I need to tend to my real life relationships. Don’t chuckle, because I can hear you and also record your absolutely meaningless IP address with which I will wreak absolutely zero havoc. I do have such tangible relationships, and they are going unattended because so much of my life exists in text, in your Google reader. In your bloglines, in your Facebook, apparently, even if it’s only that one of your friends is copying and pasting my words for her amusement. I am famous – or infamous, depending on the friend you corner and said friend’s current cycle – for my inattention to those in my life who breathe actual air and find their texts unanswered. I’m an awful friend in the everyday. I’m there when you need me, the first with a care package, or at least a heartfelt signature as a co-package sender, but I’m the last to be there when you have a moment to share about your rhino’s UTI. Or your confusion about just what happened today in the gym shower. That kind of thing.
If you want to know me in the real world – or have the balls to know me, in at least two of your cases – do let me know. I feel the need to have touch and reality and the face to face that our beautiful lives afford us. I crave each voice and the unspoken I can judge freely by way of your pursed lips or unibrow, not to mention mine in return. More and more I’m realizing that these are the connections that allow us to thrive, to add new definition to ourselves, not to mention dimensions to our writing. Without them, we are amorphous, are we not? Slippery figures without clear borders, organisms with much waste and little valuable return.
I’m not sure what this means in the long run, but it’s a demand that’s current. Pressing. A call I’m afraid to ignore. Because the fear is that should I do so, I end up the woman who teeters on that we all joke about in unintentional tweets and posts. I become detached and irrelevant, and that isn’t what anyone’s mother dreamed for her. Not that blogger was high on her list.
28 Comments
Is this your way of telling me you want me to request that you meet me for drinks? I can do that, you know.
Yes, consider yourself summoned. =-)
I want to lick both your faces, you lovely things.
Easy, Rick. ;)
Oh I would love to have drinks, mostly wine. I only ask that we go somewhere that allows me to smoke WHILE holding my glass. So that means it has to have a heated deck or, gasp, be in VA. Or I will just slip out every hour or so. But seriously, yes. Wine. Real Conversation. Am in!
Are you encouraging me to send you even more invitations?! I can do that.
What’s halfway between DC and Ft. Lauderdale. Let’s meet there next Tuesday night for dinner. K? ;)
Go have a life. Those of us that don’t will still be here when you can find a balance.
You know I’m on board.
I sort of drifted away from my online world, too. Frustration, boredom, never REALLY feeling comfortable letting it all out.
But! Now I live in DC, and I believe long ago you said we had to hang out once that happened. So…wanna hang?
Well, hey! Whaddya know?! I’m in NOVA, work 5 miles from Georgetown. And I love drinks! :)
I know you in the real world, but I want to keep knowing you. I hope you keep blogging though.
If Iowa was simply a matter of walking out your back patio door and onto my deck, we would surely make quick work of a sampler platter of appetizers and a metric crapload of boozahol. Alas, the distance, she be cripling in such regards, so we will have to toss sordid glances across the wires for now.
All I can say is I get it and I’m glad I have your number. :-)
Aw poop. Stupid living in Canada. No real-life Kris. :-(
I *love* those full body pajamas. Don’t knock them until you’ve given a pair to the sister in law you’ve never liked anyway.
You mean virtual community ain’t real? Now don’t I feel stoopid.
(not really. I get it. I do, I do. Which explains the current state of my blog.)
I’d come over and hang out and drink with you anytime. Except for the damn kids holding me back ;-) Maybe the cats can babysit?
are the full bodied pajamas the same thing as a snuggie?
if i lived closer to DC, i would love to meet you in real life!! but only in the warm weather- i hate socializing in the cold!
I look forward to talking to you everyday. OK, it’s more you talking to me, but that’s just semantics, right? I so wish I could actually throw back a glass or seven of wine with you. Though I do have a crib midget and no cats to speak of, please don’t hold it against me. So maybe I “know” you in the same way I know Brit Brit, but just because I can’t read about you in US Weekly while getting my highlights done, doesn’t mean I don’t feel like there is a relationship there and it sure doesn’t stop me from wanting to know all the fabulous and/or gory details of your life. So what if you don’t shave your head in a rage or even wear panties regularly, I don’t care. If I saw you on the street I would want to run up and say hello, hoping you didn’t take me for a creepy stalker. But I live nowhere near DC, so don’t worry about a 30ish blond jumping out of the bushes at you! Seriously, though it’s a strange relationship, it’s a relationship all the same. Your perspective on your life is amazing to read about and helps me put my own into thoughts and words. I’ve laughed, I’ve cried, I’ve gossiped about you to other girlfriends that have also gotten hooked on your blog. Don’t stop writing, we would miss you oh so much.
Come on over anytime.
We usually have wine. :)
I’d love to meet up with you honey! One day…………… in the meantime, keep posting, and any time you’re in NC or i’m in DC we’re gonna have a glass or two of wine and catch up………………
When I start reading people that my other bloggy friends know, I just decide we’re friends. So ya know, We’re Friends. With dirty calendars.
We’ve emailed each other. Does that count?
I feel like I know you. There’s wine in Idaho and I know you travel from time to time. :)
I appreciate where you’re coming from, but I would sure miss it if you decided to only speak to people “live” and in person.
I’m in. Colorado is waiting. You’ll love it.
Peace
I would love to meet you. I’m around Philly let me know when/if you come to town. I’d offer to come to DC but I’m trying to learn how to mother my 6 week old right now. When I don’t feel like I pretender, I’ll offer to visit you :)
Kris, enjoy and nurture your real life relationships. They are the ones that matter most. Reading about your life has at times made me laugh, think, and occasionally cry. If, and hopefully when, you return to writing online, most of us will be here. Although I would like to get to know you as a friend, the distance between here and there makes it unlikely. I will though have a glass in your honour.
Is this all about Bobby Bowden getting that contract extension?
He’ll retire when he’s ready and not a moment sooner.
Sweet mother of God – does this mean you’re FINALLY visiting me in Philly!?!?!?
(heehee)
” in your Facebook, apparently, even if it’s only that one of your friends is copying and pasting my words for her amusement. ” Did I do this? I know I have you in at least one photo on Facebook :)
You have to love snuggie the blanket with sleeves LOL