I’m in love with my therapist. Not in lust love, as that would not be at all appropriate, but love love, like you are with good friends. I’m referring to the ones who know better than to buy you anything with puffy paint on it and those who remember you’re allergic to shellfish. She’s a gift, this woman. A gift. There are days when I cry my eyes out in her office and others when I sit in relative silence, but no matter the content of those 50 minutes, I always leave feeling better. Sometimes better takes the form of taking on the world and other times it’s simply that I regain my footing. I’m not quite the reed in the wind that I was before. Direction and purpose are back and I’m wearing my emotional contacts once again.
I know it isn’t PC, but I find the stigma associated with therapy almost laughable. If you take 20 seconds to count up the known train wrecks in your life, you’ll probably have to remove your shoes. Pathology may not be their burden, of course, but I’m pretty sure most everyone I know could benefit from some sort of structured approach to their dysfunction, one not involving wine or hookers or the glory that is the salt and vinegar chip. The stigma associated with the vast spectrum of mental illness should have diminished with the advent of those Generation Xers, not to mention Oprah and Montel and whoever else is exposing our lives, ones full of families and marriages and PTA cougar-teen wolf relationships, for what they really are: complex interactions that are at times full of strife and obstacles that might not be best handled on our own. Still seems like plenty of people aren’t going when they probably should, and if they are, that hour is probably spent “running errands” or “having sex with that Starbucks barista in McLean” or something more socially acceptable.
To each her own, of course.
30 Comments
I agree. Completely. This can get complicated when perscription drugs are involved (that’s a whole other area of debate) - but just talking things out? Where’s the harm in that?
It took me a long time and some rather difficult moments to finally realize that all problems need not be tackled without help. It took me even longer to realize that sometimes that help needed to come from professionals and not my friends, or a bag of oreos and a good bottle of champagne.
The notion that there is weakness in seeking help is laughable.
Is she taking new patients? Hook a sister up.
Everyone should go through therapy at least once. Being able to vent to someone who is not emotionally involved in your life is so liberating. And if you’re lucky you can learn some coping skills that will serve you well your whole.
Asking for help when you need it is true strength.
Ditto what freckledk said.
And totally agree about the stigma. I’m still a little afraid to mention anything on the interwebs, in comments like this one. But I want to reach out so bad and say “ME TOO!”
i’ve always been curious about seeing a therapist but in the end i’m just too cheap to spend the $ - and blogging is free therapy.
I try to “come out” as a therapy goer as often as possible and sing its praises loudly! Thanks for this post!
I owe my personal progress to therapy/counseling/whatever you want to call it. People who listen are a godsend. I’m not a salt-and-vinegar chip gal, but buttermilk ranch kettle chips will do the trick every time. That and a glass of pinot. Oh, hey…today is my 3 Year Blogiversary! Yay me!
Amen, sistah!
Those of us who have gone to therapy KNOW that it takes strength and courage to ask for professional help. Going to my therapist is kind of like hitting a “reset” button in my mind…even if my situation or circumstances haven’t necessarily improved, I always feel better just having talked to someone about it. Because it’s totally worth the money to have an impartial party to listen to your crap.
I’m sorry– you lost me when you dissed the healing powers of the salt and vinegar chip.
Amen, sister.
I believe we should all go to therapy! The world would be a much happier, more peaceful place!
Been in therapy before…will be again. Hopefully not too much though, it usually means something’s going on and I’d like some smooth sailing for a while.
I love my therapist too. Staying anon, though, because my ex is a tool and he could use the therapy thing against me. I wish I were joking!
I just finished off a bag of salt n’ vinegar chips, so … what are you trying to say?
amen, sista
Ditto to restaurantrefugee - being a *perfectionist*, it was hard to accept that i couldn’t handle it all on my own. I’m glad I finally hit such a low point that made the call last May. I heart my counselor. Now i just need to start accepting her advice/putting it into practice…
I agree with your stigma comments, yet being fresh on the market once again, I’m anxious about when this topic should be disclosed in this fun dating game we play.
Take care, Darling!
You should see if your therapist could start stocking that coffee table near you with salt and vinegar chips. I’ll bet she would.
I’m going to see if I can find any of the people I already know with chips are willing to accept me and the flaws I struggle with. Actually, I should stop being so demanding, I’ll bring the chips.
And you can’t forget old Dr Phil!!
bringing therapy to the airwaves has probably de stigmatized things a bit perhaps?
Graffiti
A good therapist is the Dog’s Tuxedo- so wonderful. Also, laying the Starbucks barista in McLean? Overrated. Trust me.
Wait - am I hearing that there’s a hot Starbucks barista in McLean?
Therapy is a wonderful, wonderful thing. I can’t believe anyone would still judge it! Although I did think the Sopranos episodes where the other mob guys found out Tony was going were hilarious.
I’d love to do the therapy thing, when and if I can afford it.
And my favorite musician EVER has a song about the glories of therapy and the stigma. It’s Dar William’s “What Do You Hear in These Sounds.”
I had a stigma with it for most of my life. Until I went into such a deep depression that there was no way out BUT therapy.
Every single person could use therapy. It’s nice to talk to someone who isn’t related to you and knows nothing but what you tell them. You can’t beat the impartiality of it all.
I’ll never understand the stigma of therapy. It’s talking, with someone who will help you figure out problems. Big whoop.
I once told a friend how much I loved my shrink and she said, “You don’t need a shrink you need Jesus.” I asked her, “Who do you think sent me the referal?”
amen sista! spoken like a true champ, i’m so glad that people are finally taking this approach to therapy. 1. because i’m a therapist 2. because i think, that unless you have someone that is really messed up (the therapist) there is nothing BAD that can come out of talking about your “stuff”.
Always glad to hear someone, as Reagan put it, “come out” as a therapy goer. I agree completely - the counsellor I saw during my separation and divorce was a godsend! And even though things are going much more smoothly now, I still see a counsellor for a “check in” every once in a while, because I agree that everyone can benefit from one. A friend of mine once said, “Why do you need to see a counsellor, you are so normal?” and I was like, “Yeah, I’m much better than I used to be BECAUSE I see a counsellor!”
When is the new Teen Wolf 3 movie coming out anyway?
Does he meet a cougar in this one? Or is that just a Showtime After Hours plot?
So true. I have been to therapy for a number of years — I thought it might have been too many! — and still, after even more years without, I feel maybe it wouldn’t be a bad thing to go back. Because life changes. And so do we.
It is time and money well spent.