I am not, nor have I ever been, athletic. I am quite likely the only woman who avoided the vault and the flexed arm hang for all four years of high school. At the height of my prowess, I once translated a tipped softball into a ripe black eye one week before the [...]
Monthly Archives: April 2006
At some point during the weekend . . .
04.25.06 –
Jorge started using lots of words with the very-foreign “our,” apparently over-pronounced a la those Jagewwwwarrr commericals (reference: see such complex words as behaviour, flavour, and downpour)
I lit a cigarette off of my stove. My flat, electric stove.
Kim texted someone.
Mrs. Jorge had to resort to an Avril Lavigne reference when I asked her if [...]
Giggidy giggidy
04.24.06 –
Hours spent cleaning up Cricket’s hair balls and hiding human heads in places other than freezer: 5.
Dollars spent in eight minutes during the first Giant trip in two months, picking up staples other than wine, tampons, and Lean Cuisines: 76.
Acquiring a pink apron-ed, French toast-making Canadian kitchen minion for a full 48 hours: Priceless.