Monthly Archives: March 2006

A Gimp in Woman’s Clothing

In another demonstration of the pure power of my genius, I nearly gave up a digit today while trying to ease the first of a series of hand wipes through the Venus Fly Trap that is the lid’s plastic X. I also nearly lost my master’s degree when I couldn’t figure out whether you [...]

Forgive me bloggers for I have sinned.

It’s been exactly one week since my last weigh in.
In that time, I consumed a mere twelve glasses of wine and can say with certainty that no pizza touched these lips. I’m not sure if that came across clearly, so I’ll type it again. NO PIZZA. No french fries. No fondue [...]

Songs in the Key of Old Woman

I haven’t posted in days, mostly because I have been so Long Duck Dong tired and couldn’t raise my head above the keyboard. There are weeks when I feel like I have caught again that malaise that hit me in college (only eating Froot Loops and Ramen noodles + exercise limited to walking to [...]

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